Spiritual Growth

“I Refuse To Birth a Calf”: The Cry of a Foreigner In a Strange Land – A Word by Dawn Hill


There’s a call that has always been there. It is the call to come up higher. Never has there been a moment when God did not desire His people to come up higher and to come closer. Those paying attention to the Holy Spirit hear the call, recognize it and respond to it. As I listened to my apostle minister on the call to come up higher and the story of Moses, I am reminded that there is always a choice to respond to God, and our lack of response is in all actuality a response. It is complacency at its finest. When we do not desire to come up higher, when we count the cost but refuse to pay it, we reside in a place and position that was never intended for us, and we birth things from another kingdom.

I have known for quite some time that a great facet of the mantle I carry is to draw the heart of the bride of Christ back to her Beloved and to ready herself for His return. Beloved, we are supposed to be a foreigner in a strange land, but I believe we as the body suffer from spiritual amnesia. We forget that we are of another Kingdom and by doing so we choose to reside in places spiritually we were never meant to dwell. This choice transforms us from being a foreigner in a strange land to being a citizen of bondage and iniquity.

Birthing from the kingdom within you

In Exodus 32, we find a well known passage concerning the people of Israel. As they impatiently waited at the bottom of the mountain for Moses to descend from the mountain and the Presence of God, their years of bondage began to surface. They wanted another to worship. It did not take long to birth something familiar. It did not matter that Aaron proclaimed it to be dedicated to the Lord. The point is that they did not know the Lord. They knew Egypt. The phrase “You can take the Israelites out of Egypt, but you can not take Egypt out of the Israelites” comes to mind. Whatever is in us will birth something resembling the kingdom from which we belong. Church, what are we birthing?

I want to know Him more than anything, and I have come to understand that knowing Him means not knowing any other like I know Him. When you know Him, you will not give your worship to any other. When you know Him, a vast Kingdom erupts out of you. When you know Him, you will not settle for what used to captivate you. You will renounce your former self proclaimed identity so you can know Him and the power of His resurrection. You will go up the mountain, knowing that His Presence is everything.
When Moses chose to answer the beckoning of God to ascend the fiery mountain, he went as a man who had refused to be called Pharaoh’s son. He ascended up the mountain as a man who did not have Egypt within him. He went towards the glory, and because he went, he was privy to the birthing of God’s instruction. Meanwhile, the Israelites remained at the bottom, brewing with the residue of Egypt within them and content with another seeking after God on their behalf.

Make no mistake, whatever position you take to the mountain does not keep you from birthing something. The Israelites had come out of Egypt. The trouble was Egypt had not come out of them, and it showed because of what they did with their gold jewelry. Moses was in Egypt, but Egypt was not in him. He desired God’s Presence and His glory. It mattered not to him the cost.

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Ascending the mountain to know Him

I am telling you, I hear the Holy Spirit whispering in my spirit, “Remember that you are a foreigner in a strange land. You are passing through this land, and as you do, you are to ascend the mountain so that you can hear My voice and gain My instruction. I do not want you at the bottom of the mountain birthing a calf from yesterday’s bondage. I want you to want Me.”

I desire so strongly to see the body of Christ desire God in such a way that nothing illegitimate can be birthed. What if we collectively desired to know Him rather than hear someone else tell us about Him one or two days of the week? What if we longed to hear His voice for ourselves? There are people who are dedicating their “golden calf” to the Lord, but He is not in it. There are others who desire to ascend for the wrong reasons. Listen, ascension has less to do with power and more to do with a return to our First Love. It is easy to get drunk on power and the altitude of the mountain top and forget the One who met you on the mountain.

We all have a choice with this life. We can be foreigners in a strange land, denying sonship to the world and ascending the mountain so to speak, or we can allow the residue of what was not intended to keep us in bondage and stay at the base of the mountain, content with another seeking God on our behalf. One births a calf and the other births holy communion and divine instruction. Let’s choose to ascend. There’s a cost, but it’s worth it.

I refuse to birth a calf. I am answering the call to come up higher, no matter the cost. How about you?

Dawn Hill
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